I will never forget the day I walked into my home with the weight of the email on my shoulders.
“You got the email,” Cliff called me out.
I was hoping to digest the news in my heart before breaking it to him. But he saw right through me.
“Where is it?”
Six weeks ago, I’d received an email calling for humanitarian assistance in Africa. My mentor encouraged me to offer myself. I laughed, thought he was joking, and tucked it away.
Weeks later while preparing for a sermon called “Will You Risk?”, I felt God Himself chiding me gently- who was I to preach this message when I myself was unprepared to take risks anymore?
For the first time, I showed the email to Cliff. “You have to at least offer yourself,” he had said.
“It’s Congo Brazzaville,” I replied.
In a moment, the air around us hardened.
We parted for the day. I took the kids to the zoo while Cliff worked on his thesis.
He, a masculine stoic man with eyes filled with tears, picked us up in the afternoon and said, “People will blame me for allowing you to go to a dangerous place. But God asked me- how can I not?”
Two days later, a call from UNICEF confirmed the match was a poor fit. I didn’t speak French. They would look for another deployment match.
As I prayed, I chanced upon a quote: MAKE ROOM FOR WHAT YOU PRAY FOR.
I leafed through old photos of our time in Uganda. Back then, we had written our wills. We were willing to obey at all costs.
That weekend, without my parents knowing a thing, they brought over a huge bag of my old belongings.
I opened it, and there before me, lay all the clothes I had brought for all my previous mission trips, since 2006.
Was it just coincidence.
I began to pack my entire suitcase.
Last night, I received another email.
“Good news from the BLNS countries- I’ll update you soon.”
Like many things in life, I don’t know the outcome. But I do know one thing, that like a child with child-like faith, I can begin to prepare and make room for the things I’ve prayed for.
After all, God hears us. And whatever the outcome, we can trust Him that it will be good and for His glory.