I confess-
Today, I did not want to go to church.
I wanted to listen to a sermon under the covers and tick it off the checkbox.
But at the last minute, I walked in the rain, grabbed a bus and went.
I missed a stop, walked more in the rain, arriving only just in time for the message.
I looked around- I hardly recognized anyone. Those I did, were busy in conversation.
I felt alone, wanting to burst into tears but holding back because hey, I’m a speaker at this service too.
Suddenly, I understood why people can be so angry with church. You walk in wanting to find comfort and connection but find none.
Instead, your gym/office/drinking buddies seem to care a lot more.
But I remembered what i always pray before attending church every Sunday- “Dear God, let my words bless someone in 1 conversation, & let me be blessed by someone too in 1 convo.”
Just as I stood to leave, my friend, Marianne, a friend I’d met outside church and who started attending just to support me in my preaching journey, walked over.
“Wasn’t sure if you’d be here or on a plane but thought to come check in on you.”
Today, if you’re struggling with past hurts from church, if your narrative is “I came looking for love/ comfort/ encouragement but this is a superficial/ fake/ programmatic place only for cool people,” know this- I hear you.
But you know what?
Church is a big space.
People make the church.
They aren’t perfect.
But won’t you pray with me that every Sunday, even if you have to trek there like me in awful weather and miss a stop with public transport, that your words may bless someone, even it’s just 1 person, and you in turn might be blessed.
It all starts somewhere.
Thank you, Marianne 💛🔥