We’re all sitting on trains, with our destinations in mind. Crumpled, our train tickets lie in our pockets, as evidence of our imagined goals.
We’re so sure, we’re going to get there- it says right there on the train route. Yet, our hearts dangle on the line between certainty and doubt, furiosity and fear- will I get there in time? What if I fall asleep? What if the train breaks down? What if I get off the wrong stop?
For the journey of life rolls out interminably and our fears are real. The banality of monotonous train-chugging can lull one to sleep, causing one to miss one’s stop altogether. And we awaken, wondering how we got to where we were, so far away from one’s nostalgic dream, the dream of long-ago, of truth and steel.
And trains do break down- people get cancer, the kindest get run down by buses. And sometimes, at a busy station, where everyone rushes to get down, the throng’s allure draws us to the wrong station and we become stranded at once.
Sometimes, surprises happen too. The train takes a different route, we end up in a place we’ve never gone before.
So it is with our callings.
We’re on a train, with a destination in mind. We can worry about a million mishaps, but God knows His way for our lives. We can hold on to dreams too tightly, forgetting that God orchestrates our life events. But perhaps what’s most important is to enjoy the ride and to listen acutely to the Train Conductor’s voice, so we know when to change trains, when to get off.
Station after station, step by step, we get closer to the destination.
After my emergency medicine exam, an impulse beckoned me to attend a gathering organised for doctors and missionaries at Healthserve. A doctor asked me about my life, I shared about how I wasn’t sure of my ‘calling’ anymore, whether it was from God or myself, how to discern the difference, wasn’t sure of what lay ahead. Short-term or long-term missions? Place of servive? Surgery or public health? Future family plans?
And true enough, God spoke to me through a pastor, a volunteer and a doctor- collectively they said, “Most missionaries I know didn’t have an earthshaking Call before they entered the field. Most just lived their lives steadfastly, and step by step, God led them to the desires of their hearts. God can place the peace in your heart too. Don’t worry, you will get there. ”
I am learning. There’s no point being too eager to reach one’s destination. No point worrying how we will reach there. Time has its own way of making things right. Perhaps what’s most important is to enjoy the ride and to listen acutely to the Train Conductor’s voice, so we know when to change trains, when to get off.
Step by step, station after station, we will get there. Even if There is a place we’ve never dreamt of before.