Stargazing.

That’s the problem with refusing the stars. Because they burn so brightly millions of light years away, nothing you can ever do will stop them shining on you, even if you refuse them. One, made by God, has a duty to shed its light on you, for you.

 To be honest, by the time you came along, I thought it was too late. I had been through the cycles of waiting, and praying and giving up and by the time the stars were aligned I simply decided I didn’t need anyone but God to walk through life with me.

 Then here you came, tumbling along, crashing into my world and causing Cosmic Chaos.

 Your impact in my life was, is, celestial.

 That’s the problem with refusing the stars. You can never win, heh.

 Most of us, however, are on the other end of the spectrum: young, single and yearning, and never quite being able to handle the uncertainty of whether or not somewhere out there, a star just for you, shines on and for you. I think we all live with the uncertainty that perhaps God of the universe might have just forgotten a little star-shaped blessing for our lives. But He never forgets.

 Just days ago after a morning bike ride, it was a good friend who shared with me how lonely he felt at times, how he longed for a companion and wondered if perhaps, he would ever find the right one. It’s a phase we all plough through, and it is true to some extent, that the more we have committed to God to serve and love Him, the more it could seem that the right person could be harder and harder to find. It’s like looking for that star named for you in a velvety, endless night sky. It seems impossible.

 But perhaps, all we need to remember, is that all stars need for alignment, really, is time. Because God of the universe holds all the plans for our lives in His hands.

 And an unexpected blessing of a meteorite might just come heading your way.

I just want to share this because I know how it feels like. That feeling of loneliness, dread and frustration at times. That feeling of uncertainty, resignation and inner struggle with one’s insecurity. How is it possible that God has someone out there just for me. And the truth of the matter is, most of us do have choices at one point or another. Choices to mingle, choices to know people, choices to choose from. But these choices, while not bad, could potentially distract us. They make us wonder: Am I being too picky?  Maybe I should just broaden my criteria and look out a bit more?

I need to say this. Don’t settle. God gave you a high calling for a reason. So to all the young ladies out there- I just wanted to say: keep your standards sky-high. No pun intended. Somewhere out there, a star awaits you.

I’ve never had a boyfriend for 24 years of my life. I was too much of a nerd when I was younger, and too much of a wild child passionate about long-term missions when I was older. I remember I had pretty much reached the boiling point of frustration in one season of my life, after realizing how God’s calling upon my life had serious implications on my future relationships. Few people want to do long-term mission work. Few enjoy triathlon. Few understand the slavish hours a doctor works. Most significantly, I wondered if anyone would ever understand and love me for who I am. Today, many people preach the theory that there really is a number of people you could end up with who are right for you, and not just one.

But deep inside I am die-hard romantic and till today, I strongly believe in the one, because I believe (and you are free to disagree) that God has a Best plan, a choice for you above the rest.

Women often think: I am too messy. I ask for too much.

To that, I only have one thing to say. Don’t settle. You only need one right star for you, and no other. God has placed you exactly where He wants you to be at that time, and it is crucial for you to remain in precise cosmic alignment for that momentous collision to occur.

Looking back, it was precisely because I was so focused on God that our paths crossed. You love the poor. You dream of doing long-term missions. You even do triathlon. You lived ten thousand miles away. What were the chances?

Looking back, the amazing thing is how I felt almost powerless when you collided into me. It was as if a forcefield of some sort had binded our paths and that there was no way I could refuse the stars. God opened door after door, showed me, us, sign after sign. And now that we’re together, it amazes me, day after day, how God continually surprises me by showing me how aligned we are, in ways I never thought possible. In big ways- our dreams for mission work, our values about simple living, our love for the poor; In small ways- the way you are so intricately in tune with my emotional, spiritual and even physical needs that it stuns me to know someone like you exists.

I am just amazed, at how our first date, by some divine accident, ended up as a the first of a series of formal lessons at a marriage preparation course. I am amazed, by the numerous times you surprise me by waiting hours for me at the hospital lobby at the oddest of times because of my exhausting shifts and how incredibly thankful and touched I am by the ways you show love to me. I am amazed, at how we speak each other’s love languages so fluidly and naturally and how you quote the bible so freely and easily.

I love the fact you’re a missionary. I love the fact you gave up everything you had in Canada to work for OMF in Singapore, the international missions organization I dream of working for. (Amazing how my best friend’s dad turns out to be your colleague at work!) I love the fact you’re almost a decade older than me and fit all the criteria I asked God for many, many years ago, and are so much more.

I love how in so many unexpected ways, you fit me so well, without me even realizing it. And I know it sounds cliché, but it’s as if all this while, God had been preparing us for each other.

So I’ll say it again: Don’t settle. Don’t for one moment think it’s impractical to pursue God because it lessens your chances of meeting “the one”. God knows better. He needs for you not to settle so His plans can run according to His original intent.

I’m a believer of love now. I believe broken people can hold on to hope, because that’s what stardust is made of. I believe broken people can help each other heal, because prayer is real. I believe broken people can love, because God’s love covers a multitude of sins.

Somewhere, out there, a meteorite is burning away at a million miles per hour and heading your way…

 It just takes time, a patient waiting, and a development of character to find your security and identity in God, so you don’t pin them in another man. Be impatient, and risk missing out on the biggest firework display in the galaxy of your life.

 

You may not believe it, but stay focused, and be exactly where God wants you to be.

 

Keep your standards sky-high and be amazed at how God answers prayers.

 

Just don’t settle.