Over the years, I’ve been fascinated by how two little words “I’m sorry” can have such a profoundly life-giving, restorative impact, or, when delivered wrongly, spark deeper anger.
Recently, at the receiving end of different kinds of apologies for my injury caused during a physiotherapy session, I felt led to share what I learnt from a mind-blowing book I’d read some time back, called “Something’s Not Right” by Wade Mullen.
If you’ve been at the receiving end of an apology that didn’t have a freeing quality to it, it might be because it didn’t have the elements of a true one. While it might seem obvious, not everyone is equipped or ready to make a sincere apology. We’ve all made that mistake before.
Reluctance to say it, the delay in delivering it, or the need to defend oneself while giving it all emasculate it of its power.
“When I keep an apology focused entirely on the harm caused by my behavior, then the other person is more open to… an explanation to what went wrong. But an apology takes on a different purpose whenever it becomes a defense.” – Wade Mullen
If you need to apologize to someone this year end season, I hope this helps. And if you’re at the end of a flaccid apology that troubles you, I hope this will give you the framework to understand what happened to you, discern what you are forgiving and move on from it when you’re ready to do so.❤️🩹