“What if I made the wrong choice?”
I lay awake, pondering if I’d made the right choice of surgeon between two who’d suggested different types of surgery.
“God, would you speak?”
But how? I didn’t share my dilemma with friends, nor on social media.
That evening, I received a phonecall. A blog follower whom I’d not met in over ten years called me- “Wai Jia, I ended up studying overseas and did part of my training in Spine. I saw your recent post about having upper limb weakness and pain, so wondered if you have X condition- and felt to tell you if you’re deciding to choose between this or that approach, it’s really important you choose the latter!”
Tears brimmed my eyes.
“And I have to tell you how important physio is for rehab.”
I sighed inside. Physiotherapy is expensive, and the chances of his recommended physiotherapist being affordable and accessible to me was paper thin.
But who would have known that his recommended physio works in the same clinic 5 min from where I live, and could co-see me with my original physio, and that insurance would cover its cost?
As I was wheeled into the operating theatre, my heart pounded a thousand hooves. The anaesthetist chirped, “Do you know you’ve got the best spine neurosurgeon in Singapore treating you?”
I didn’t know.
After my ICU stay, I was transferred to the general ward. I found out that it was a premium room because all the standard rooms were filled 😭
On the third morning of my hospital stay, I longed for visitors. A pharmacist working the night shift saw my name in her list and decided to drop by. A dozen friends made their way down that afternoon unexpectedly.
I’d longed to thank the first doctor and nurse who’d convinced me to get that MRI done, and bumped into them at the corridor outside my room as they were treating a patient next door.
In times when I wrestle if God is real, in times when I doubt His love, I realize, this is how real God can be. This is how much He loves us. 💛
*Thank you for yr prayers. Rehab’ll take months and the pain continues to limit, but will cont to trust God.