Minutes before I went up on stage, my knees used to quiver uncontrollably.
I’d to hold them with my hands.
A year later on the speaking circuit, things are different 💛
My five-year old’s repeated prayer seeps powerfully into me- “Dear God, I pray Mama will be VERY HAPPY and You give her a GOOD TIME when she speaks.”
Today, it happened— again.
I initially canceled my sporting commitments in the morning, telling myself – “It’s the responsible thing to do, I don’t wanna pull a muscle just before I speak.”
But it was a dear mentor who corrected me, “That’s acting from a posture of fear, not faith. Fearing misfortune is a lack of faith.” 😨
I learnt, that it is our littlest decisions made in the private, quiet spaces of our hearts that eventually have eternal consequences our eyes may not see.
I took a deep breath of faith, showed up for my usual brutal Sunday community workout, before speaking my message entitled “Disappointment with God.”
“God does not look down on trivia. He turned water into wine at a wedding, not that the people really needed it. He fed the five thousand, not that they would die of hunger. He’s intimately interested in the details of our lives for His own sake, and it is in the smallest moments of our decision-making when He’s interested in the posture of our hearts.”
I learnt an important lesson today— that as much as we picture serving others as a solemn and sacred affair, God cares that we do so from a posture of unabashed joy and deep, radical faith.
Today, I found that. Thank you for being there, for journeying with, and for rejoicing with me 🥹
To those of you who came and cried and laughed with me as we recounted a story from our wedding as our marriage turns 10 years this month, and to those of you who’ll wait for the recording when it’s released, thank you 💛