“WANT TO GET HURT AH!”
He snarled at my children as we stood behind in queue.
“Excuse me,” I said gently. “If you have anything you’d like to say, please tell it to me, and not my children.”
“YOU! I TELLING YOU! YOU DONT KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE YOUR CHILDREN!”
My face burned. This wasn’t the first time this had happened- being shouted at by older men in public for not being a “better mother.”
I took a deep breath. He walked away.
“It’s okay, children-we don’t have to react to everything.”
I thought about what it meant to model self-control, what it meant not to be overcome by evil. I made a choice.
I walked back, hot soup in hand. I shared what happened with Cliff, our all-time harmony man.
For the first time in my life, I watched in fear and awe as he got out of his seat.
“He was being disrespectful to you, I’m going over.”
“No no, Im fine.” But he was gone.
My heart raced.
“Pray, Mama,” my 5-year old said. “Got to pray for Papa.”
“Oh yes, we do,” I whispered. I watched, feet locked, fearing fists might fly.
A brisk exchange of words. Then finally, to my relief, Cliff walked back.
“What happened?”
“I asked him what he said to my kids. And to you. He said ‘NOTHING!’ I told him that you know how to be a good mother, and it’s not his place to tell you how to be one.”
Tears welled up behind my eyes.
For the first time, I understood the paradox of turning the other cheek. While I had chosen not to return evil for evil, my husband had risen to his role as protector to defend me. What he’d displayed was not tit-for-tat, but a courageous standing up for his wife and children.
“I will never forget this moment,” I said, holding back tears.
To those of you who’ve asked me about bullies, how to take things lying down when the world hurls hurt on you, I’ll say this- the Lord is our Defender. While we may not stand up for ourselves, we can trust that He will make things right- in often unseen but sometimes, seen and felt ways.
I thank God for the men in our lives who understand their role and power not to lead by oppression and disdain, but by chivalry and courage.
Thank you, @cliff.tam. I will never forget this day.