IG highlights of NGL Q&A can be found here.
Q1. I’ve 2 preschool girls too. How and when you do plan to start sexual education with them and any guidance?
I’m no expert on this.
But believe it or not, I do think sex education can start at a very early age!
Yes, we’ve started!
It’s all about being age appropriate.
At this age, I’d tell them the names of different body parts, including their sex organs, without hiding them using another name. This helps remove the shame or embarrassment around sex organs and facilitates better conversations in future, I believe.
This is also a great time to talk about boundaries, consent and respect-
What is okay to touch?
What is not okay?
Who do you tell?
Where can friends or strangers touch and what do you do if your boundaries are crossed?
Q2. I’m going to turn 30 soon, and I’m single. I think I’m largely okay with my singleness, although I sometimes struggle with loneliness when I see my friends getting married and starting a family. I’ve well-intended friends who have encouraged me to use the dating app but I’m not comfortable doing so.
If you’re uncomfortable with something,
it’s all right to trust your instincts.
When it comes to meeting someone, I really believe God can meet you where you’re at.
Struggling with loneliness is normal and very valid. I’m really proud of and encouraged by your awareness of what you’re comfortable and uncomfortable with— that’s a great step in setting boundaries.
Keep trusting God with your future- whether single or attached, and don’t let anyone tell you what life “should” look like. Let God’s peace be your witness.
Q3. What’s your view on dating someone who’s the complete opposite of them in terms of personality, lifestyle, faith, interests, etc.
Haha, Cliff and I are polar opposites in terms of personality, strength finders and lifestyle!
He’s a night owl, I’m a morning bird. He’s relational, I’m task-oriented. You get the gist!
But when it comes to FAITH & LIFE VALUES,
I believe this is where resonance must be found, if you believe your union is about pursuing a purpose greater than yourselves.
Ultimately, people change over time. Arguably, our faiths and values can change, too!
But I see our faith, purpose and life values as compasses.
And if you’re two different people coming together against a great big world, I think it’s wonderful to find someone ready to take it on with a compass anchored on similar grounds.
Q4. About doing what u enjoy, how do u know what you are passionate about and not just a one-off interest?
Only TIME will tell ❤️
It’s a hard answer, because nobody likes waiting.
Everyone loves to jump into something they’ve found that they like and hope like crazy it’s the right fit.
It’s kind of like dating-
but often, TIME reveals whether it’s just a crush or a real life-long passion.
So…
Just give yourself TIME.
Q5. what do you do when you are unmotivated to work
I think I’ve shared this answer in different forms to previous questions but here goes again!
1. Clarify your values. Ask yourself- what do I value?
2. Clarify your alignment. Does my work reflect what I value?
If YES:
3. Troubleshot.
Ask yourself – what is causing the lack of motivation?
Is it burnout, stress, discouragement etc?
4. Pray.
5. HANG IN THERE.
If NO:
3. Ask yourself- what am I still here?
4. Pray
5. Decide if it’s time to QUIT and find a different job that aligns with your values and calling.
Q6. Hi! How do we discern God’s voice/will above our own? It’s a question I have been mulling over!
This is really a fantastic question!
And one which I’ll take the chance to recommend Henry Blackaby’s books again- “Hearing God’s Voice” and “Experiencing God.”
In his books, he basically shares how God’s voice can take the form of gaining alignment with the Word, our circumstances, community and an inner witness.
My version?
I think it’s often wise to weigh how we feel or what we think against the above.
So in short, perhaps you could ask yourself:
1. What do I think/feel/want?
2. Does this align with what God says in the Bible or His principles?
3. What do my circumstances point to?
4. What do my mentors or trusted community think?
5. Do I have an inner peace about this?
Q7. I feel tired from serving in a ministry at times. And I feel guilty from being tired and
frustrated. I understand the purpose of doing God’s work but sometimes I really just want to take a break from everything yet I feel wrong even just thinking about it.
Whoever asked this, my heart goes out to you because I FEEL YOU!
So, I wanna share from experience, and also use what I did yesterday as an analogy.
Here’s the surprising news-
God actually doesn’t NEED us to serve. He’s got the universe in His hands!
Serving, however, is an opportunity to partner, a privilege to see His hand move mountains.
But let’s be real.
Serving is tiring! Often, we can feel BURNT OUT.
This is where good boundaries and a healthy ethos of service comes in.
Let me use this workout as an example.
I am lifting very light weights here, because it’s all I can manage without having the weights land on my face.
It’s hard because I’m keeping elbows in, my triceps are weak etc.
The problem with many of us is we ministry as weights, and we keep wanting to lift heavier when it’s not the right season, or our bodies aren’t ready.
I look around, and of course, again- I’m the weakest!
But it doesn’t matter.
Because God doesn’t care how heavy we lift. He doesn’t need us to do the heavy lifting!
Do you believe He just wants us to ENJOY working out and serving in ministry just for the sake of it, for our own personal well-being?