I’ll be honest.
Cliff was shocked when I said what I did.
“Again? Really?”
My restless spirit heaved within me. Just 3 months after we had returned from Uganda, my heart, burdened by the refugee crisis around the world, fidgeted in my soul. As I scoured ways to help, I explored different avenues, some of which included providing medical aid on a boat on the front-line, or moving to a disaster-relief area in the Middle-east.
But deep down, I knew it was not what God was calling us to do, in this season of our lives.
At times, in our work-focused, achievement-driven society, we blame our loved ones for limitations in our lives. At times, I wondered where else I would be if I weren’t married. I wondered what adventures we would be on without children.
In those dreamy moments of transient self-absorption, I find action, thrill and self-satisfaction, while losing logic and wisdom.
At a talk yesterday where Cliff was speaking at, I was reminded of the amazing life God has given Him, and the amazing adventures God has sent us on because of Cliff. Instead of being a limitation, why don’t we see our family, spouses and children as opportunities to serve God in? Instead of using them as excuses or burdens while we grumble and murmur about fitting our lives around them, why don’t we ask God for His grand plans for our lives, and see how we can fit our lives around His?
Yesterday, as I listened to my husband share his inspiring story of how God gave him a 2nd chance at life, and led him not only to live an ordinary, but an extra-ordinary life, I was moved yet again.
Truly, in spite of all the odds against us and against him, God has brought us to places we never dared dream of. I can choose to think- if I weren’t married, I could go with Doctors Without Borders to Syria and this and that… Or I can choose to think- what is God’s will for the both of us now, as we are joined as One?
When we surrender to Him within His, and not our pre-conceived boundaries, we find limitless strength, freedom and joy riding on His mindblowing adventures. If it weren’t for Cliff, I knew that I might never have served in Uganda, nor would we have borne the fruit we did.
Like me, do you occasionally find yourself “blaming” your family and commitments today for not realizing the inner itch you have in your heart to do something daring for the world? Are you grumbling about the “what if”s that could have been if you weren’t married/ didn’t have children/ had a different set of parents?
Stop.
God has a plan and purpose for you and your loved ones. Instead of trying to work out your own plans around your already circumscribed circumstances (God, see I can’t do this- look I have kids and a job and my parents etc), ask Him what He has in store for you and your loved ones, in your situation. Does He not know your commitments and ties?
If you are willing to surrender, He will take not only you, but your family, on the most amazing, faith-filled adventure of your lives, in His season, in His time, in His way.
So I’m grateful to be married to you, Cliff. You will always be my bestie, not burden.
Here’s to waiting on God for our next adventure together ahead.
“Because of my condition, I’m on immunosuppressants every day.
I could not take the Yellow Fever vaccine, which was compulsory for entry into East Africa. But I told myself- wherever we choose to serve, there will be risks-
where else is safer than in the palm of our Father’s hand?
Resilience is not in-born, it is a choice.
Through the circumstances of my life, God taught me obedience,
and through that obedience, trust.
Through trusting, He grew resilience inside of me which then
allowed me to live my faith today.”
– my favorite speaker Cliff Tam, on the topic of “Resilience”
at the Q Commons Talk on 26 Sept 2015
