Her name is Faith.

I was in utter shock when it happened. I still am.

This is a long story, so take a breather before you start.

J took leave from work for me that day. “I just want to take you to have a look.”

“But… I’m not buying anything, J… I… I can’t. Anyway, I’ve class tomorrow. I’m happy already, I don’t need anything.”

“No buts. This time, I INSIST. I’ve taken leave already. And I’ll arrange for JT to drive us around for the day. If you’ve class, we’ll go during lunchtime.”

“But…”

“Okay, see you tomorrow.”

Maybe it was God’s will, but my class at hospital got cancelled that day so we had the whole afternoon to ourselves. It was said that my professor had a homicide case to attend to- now what were the chances of that happening.

I can never understand why God chose to bless me with friends like them: J is a very busy woman, her leave is precious- and yet she chose to spend it on me. JT lives on the other side of the island, yet he drove all the way to the east to play chauffeur to J and I for the day. He’s the same one who’s always been ever so helpful to lend or give me his sports equipment whenever he saw I could do with an extra bike light, a hydration belt… Batman and Ds slow down to cycle with me so they can push me on, ” What’s important is you do your best every time and improve. “

They all knew about Alisha. They all knew why I wasn’t getting a new bike anymore. They all saw how my current bike’s brakepads and gears were giving up on me, and how it was just, too big. Apparently, J had a word with them all. None of them could bear seeing me leave the group so in spite of what had happened, they tried every way to make me stay.

Just when I had given up hope, my Sunday School class of 7 to 8 year-olds reminded me of the importance of prayer, of asking, and of being persistent and patient in waiting for answers. Just when I thought I wanted to quit cycling, my training buddies each went the extra mile for me and showed me how much they valued not my performance but me.

Deep down inside, I knew that it would be impossible to find a bicycle meant for me unless it was God’s plan. I struggled. God, why is roadcycling so expensive? Is it wrong to enjoy the sport? Are you telling me to stop?

I wanted to block it out of my mind, immerse myself into reading biographies about missionaries so I wouldn’t think about it.

Deep down, I knew that even with ten thousand dollars, I might never find the right bike if it was God’s plan for me to stop the sport. If you really want me to continue, then I’ll need a clear sign, God.

Some weeks back, JT told me about Soul. It was the name of a shop I’d never heard of before. It was 5 minutes away from church. They sold individual bike parts so there would surely be a fit for my too-long-legs and too-short-torso. It’s not too popular only because it’s a local brand, which means it wouldn’t be too flashy. There was a model on discount. And the name of the bike?

Faith.

It was white, red and black- the same colour as the previous bike I had wanted and the only colour it comes in. When I saw it, I knew it was the one.

Weeks ago, JT had text-messaged me: “Found a model, Faith from this brand called Soul for you. Name sounds Christian too. Next time you can introduce yourself this way, ‘Hi, I’m Wai Jia. My bike has soul and her name is Faith. Check it out online.”

Kitesong is a book about dreaming big dreams and having the faith in God to do so.

I didn’t buy the expensive bike I wanted with the money I had, against majority’s advice- in an act of faith that God had a different plan which I didn’t know about. (He spoke to me glaringly through a morsel of words which pierced me so deeply I knew I had to listen.) I gave up my cheque for Alisha in an act of faith that God would provide for both her needs and mine. When I did finally find a sponsor for her, the sponsor liked the draft for my 2nd book, A Taste of Rainbow, and its cause to help people suffering from depression and eating disorders, so much that she wanted to sponsor it- the first page of the book writes, “Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.- Hebrews 11:1″. The rainbow to me, represents God’s promise to us, a culmination of our faith. The past few weeks of Sunday School lessons which I had been assigned to teach because the other teachers kept taking leave were all about teaching the kids the importance of praying with faith.

That night after JT told me about Faith, I visited the website I visit every night before I sleep and I had goosebumps all over me when I read the prayer passage for the day-it was about an unlikely gift and a girl named… Alisha.

Freaky, almost.

While training one day, it also suddenly hit me that the centrepiece hung in my room writes, “Without Faith, it is impossible to please God because anyone who comes to Him must believe He exists and rewards those who earnestly seek Him.- Hebrews 11:6″


I’d heard of swanky names like Trek, Giant, Cervelo, Orbea, Wilier… but Faith? Who’d name a bike that? And why hadn’t I heard of it earlier?

Perhaps, God has his timing.

So when I saw it, I just… knew it was the one. God seemed to have answered part of my prayer. Some people had told me that about the relatively poor service they had received from the bike-designer but when I met him, we hit it off immediately- simply because he is an artist too. “I don’t believe in God at all, but I named this design Faith after my late best friend because I wanted to believe he went to a better place. I don’t usually tell people these things.” I liked him immediately.

Just last Sunday, one of my sunday school children, little Sophia, sheepishly whispered into my ear. “Dear God, I pray for Jiejie Wai Jia that you help her in her coming exams and bless her with a bicycle. Amen.” Thank you darling, I said. I couldn’t see it happening but kissed her on her forehead anyway.

Part of my sadness came from my shame for liking roadcycling so much and for not being cool enough for making the sacrifice for Alisha. In the face of poverty and missions and humanitarian work, why should cycling matter. But a friend reminded me yesterday, that we love God in more ways than one, and we display His glory and wonder when we take the talents He’s blessed us with and pursue them with a spirit of excellence and a heart of purity and humility. Our love for God and people, can come in various forms. That is why we can delight God even in studying, in working, in art and sport and eating and drinking. That is why when the guilty woman poured a jar of expensive perfume on God and people scolded her for being wasteful because ‘the money could have been given to the poor’, God defended her. You know, I never understood that story till today. I always wondered how God could allow that.

The hardest lesson for me to learn was: The poor and the disadvantaged will always be important to God, but we need to recognise, that more importantly, we must live our lives the way He wants us to in every point in time. If it means studying in an expensive college to be the best doctor possible, then so be it. But one must have the right heart attitude. It’s hard for me to learn that, because I grew up reading Mother Teresa.

More than just being about a stupid bicycle and a little girl’s whining, I learnt, that this entire process was about character development and learning about God. I finally discovered, that I love to cycle not because of pride or ego, but truly, because of the friends I made through it, because of the life lessons this sport has taught me, because of how it has helped me find joy and recover and get on with my life so much better than before. I told J before, that if I hadn’t met her through cycling, I would definitely have relapsed.

Faith, in both senses, helped me to realise that.

I learnt, that I could have happily ignored God and bought that very first bike I liked so much. But I would have set myself many steps back in terms of character growth. God’s way in God’s time is always best.

I learnt also, that it’s okay to ask God, because like what I taught my 7 year-olds, the process of asking purifies our hearts’ motives.

I learnt also, ha, that a sacrifice is a sacrifice. And I love my parents for not giving in to buying me a new bike because of the decision I made. Last night, they said to me, “Christmas is coming, so we’re giving you a small sum of money. You can loan the rest from us if you need to and pay it back when you start working. Okay?”

I thanked them in gratitude, then sighed to myself. That was less than half of what Faith cost. And I knew, I would never have the peace to buy something so costly for myself. It’s just, not right, and not for me. So close, yet so very far.

After seeing Faith, I thanked JT and J, “I don’t know why you took leave from work for me even though you know I won’t buy anything soon. But I want you to know I really enjoyed your company, and I’ve been encouraged to train better, haha. I’ve been happy riding on my current bike. And that’s enough for me.” I sighed and thanked God, because even though I didn’t have Faith yet, seeing her gave me hope to believe that there was something out there meant for me.

Thank you J, JT, Batman and Ds. For being so encouraging regarding what I did for Alisha even though some have called me Foolish. For understanding why I can’t see myself buying such an expensive item, because of the people I’ve met on past mission trips and because of my conviction that poverty today is caused by people buying too many things for themselves and not enough for others. Thank you for not telling me to save up because you know I could not forgive myself for getting a spanking-new bike. Thank you for being patient with me. For riding with me on this journey called life, for insisting when I resist, for pushing me when I pull back, for loving me and riding with me and for teaching me so much.

It was nice seeing Faith that day.

Sometimes, perhaps it is hard to imagine why God would take an interest in our lives. In the big scheme of things, why should my love for cycling matter? In the light of poverty, famine, wars and tragedy, why did this weigh heavy on me? I am learning, how God is not interested just to make us labour to serve the poor, but is interested in our lives, hearts and development, too.

The story doesn’t end here.

After our training today, as we sat together to cool down and have a drink, J made an announcement.

“Ahem, ahem. Christmas is coming. And oh look, we’re all in red and white today. Wai Jia, we are playing Santa Claus and we want to tell you a group of us have pooled together a sum of money and we got Faith for you. Your parents only need to pay for the groupset (gears).”

They didn’t know that the sum of money my parents had given me was roughly the cost of the groupset.

I was in utter shock.

JT’s text message, J’s insistence on taking me to the bike shop, Batman and Ds’ encouragement to me to keep training, their enthusiasm in askingaskingasking me about my preferences and insistence I had to train with them today… … suddenly all made sense. I didn’t know, but they’d been plotting and scheming and conspiring behind my back for a long time.

All this while, I never believed they would do something like this. It was surreal. I thought they were just trying to psycho me into getting a bike for myself.

” Just touched by your act of kindness.”

” The honour is mine.”

” You certainly deserved it.”

After a good ten minutes of me burying my head in my hands from shock, I finally found the strength to snap out of my speechless stupor to utter, “Thank you… thank you so much guys. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me in my life.”

We took a photo together with my old bike. As we got onto our bikes, I said, “Guys, is today the 19th?”

“Yeah.”

“Wow… You won’t believe this. I… I… got my current bike last year on… the 19th of December, too.”

Silence.

“So… it’s about time!” Al said. They all laughed.

“I don’t how to thank you… I really don’t.”

“Just… pay it forward, Wai Jia. When someone else has a need, pay it forward.”

As I wheeled my bike home still engulfed in utter disbelief, in a state of paralysed shock, I looked at the grey sky and remembered what the missionary looking after Alisha said- that I would get my bike because God isn’t a scrooge. She always taught me that God would honour what we did for Him. I laughed into the cloudy sky and said aloud, “You win, God. You win, hands down.”

Then a large rainbow-coloured umbrella caught my eye.

A rainbow. In the bible, it means God’s promise. In my book called A Taste of Rainbow, the rainbow represents a culmination of…

… Faith.

So you ask me how come I know God is real.

I just… do.