This had happened before- the feeling of my heart about to explode out of my chest. I couldn’t breathe.
If I didn’t stop it, it’d become a full-blown panic attack.
It was as if everything chose to break at the same time. On a week where I’d a thousand deadlines to bend to, my phone cable disappeared. My cell was running low on battery. I’d run out of talk time on my local phone. Then just as I left office, I plucked out my international adaptor and there it was, broken into two.
I walked to the supermarket. There on the aisle lay every imaginable kind of adapter, except the one I needed. I walked across to a deserted mall, hoping to try my luck. Everything was closed.
My heart sank. I had too many deadlines to have my laptop die on me.
Without talk time on my phone, I had no one to call. What if there was no international adaptor to be found anywhere?
I felt lightheaded.
Darkness was setting in. I had to settle this and walk back- fast.
I wished Cliff was with me in Africa. He’d put things in perspective. Tell me it would be okay. Tears welled up.
I took a deep breath-
– And I remembered what Ps Dowdy had told me- “Learn to lean into God, you can walk and talk with Him-just like your hubby. It can become real.”
And just like that, in a moment, I felt the Lord close to me, and Cliff himself by my side.
Before I’d left, I’d told Cliff how I wouldn’t like where the local team had put me up. I wanted to stay by the mountainside and Cliff said, “No, you’re alone-stay in the city, where you can get what you need.”
“But it’ll be so smokey! I hate cities.”
Petulantly, I argued. Then, submitted.
Time and time again, whenever I submitted to Cliff, God would be faithful to show me the blessing in His promise of submission.
As I walked to the icky, busy grocery store nearest where I stayed, there hanging on a little metal rod, was my international adaptor. And by a little popcorn stand, was my talk time top-up kiosk. All in one place.
By my side, was God walking with me, smiling, saying, “I’ve got you.”
And on my other side, I could hear Cliff whisper to me with his megawatt smile, “I told you so.”
I smiled too.
