When my almost 4-yr old bawled after her birthday party at home ended, I held her in my arms, rocking her.
“Was it disappointing for you?” I asked.
“Yes, Mama.”
A big part of me wanted to explode in a tirade telling her how much effort I’d made to organize 2 celebrations in 2 days and how she needed to stop crying because I was tired. But I didn’t. I’m grateful I held her and rocked her and asked her why she felt that way.
“Papa was talking to other people. Mama you were not playing with me. Nobody was playing with me.”
Suddenly, when I saw the world through her eyes, I understood. It made sense.
“It was a bad party for you, wasn’t it?”
At once, that moment of empathy gave us a breakthrough. Her tears stopped, she breathed in and out, grateful that finally, someone understood.
“Thank you for sharing, sweetheart. You did good. We love you. Tomorrow’s your real birthday. Let’s try this all over. We love you.”