I remember my parents were extremely concerned to know that Cliff had grown up in Canada, halfway across the world. After all, weren’t cross-cultural marriages more fragile and vulnerable to conflict? While we’ve had our fair share of differences, however, we find that the cross-cultural aspect of our marriage has instead been a great source of fun, bringing a warm touch into skirmishes, and colour to sepia routine.
From horrified discoveries (“What? You’ve NEVER had papaya with lime??”) to ghastly vernacular surprises (“What? You call an orange a what? A CLEMENTINE?”) to linguistic differences (“What did you say? Huh? Pronounce that again? OHHHH!”), we’ve had our fair share of exasperated moments peppered with lots of good laughs at each other and ourselves.
The most enjoyable part about a cross-cultural marriage in my opinion, however, would be listening to endless stories about a different place. Conversations hardly run dry- there’s always something about his childhood in snow or teenage years hiking up nature’s trails, or a uniquely-Canadian festival that I, a workaholic living in a tropical urban concrete jungle, listen in fascination to. And while many claim it is the gap of differences in cross-cultural relationships that push couples apart, I also think there’re also more occasions to celebrate, and more unique moments to remember.
We have decided to celebrate our 1st wedding anniversary this weekend by seeing who can out-surprise who.
I, being the typical Singaporean, decided to get a head-start! Since we were in Hong Kong visiting Cliff’s grandma over Canadian thanksgiving, I decided to put something together to surprise the Hungry Husband. Remembering how God had brought us together made me realize how much he has given up to stay in a land so different from where he grew up in.
So… I brought a little bit of Canada back home!
A sneaky dinner surprise!
Actually, I only thought of this last-minute surprise on my way home. No, I didn’t make it… It was quick and easy, heh. I realize a small roast doesn’t cost very much if you can find the right supermarket, and with a bit of greens from home, it can look like a fancy meal! I wrote the card and drew the Canadian maple leaf on the train on the way home. It was something which came to mind when I had asked Cliff how he used to celebrate Thanksgiving when he was back in Canada with friends and family. The cross-cultural conversation went like this:
“So how did you usually celebrate Thanksgiving back in Canada?”
” Dinner with family, and close family friends.”
“Do you have turkey?” I ask this because I know Cliff loves chicken and turkey.
“Not usually. It’s too small a crowd. Turkeys are huge.”
“Don’t you have like… a small turkey?” I ask innocently.
And the Canadian husband stops in his tracks and says with the straightest face ever as if I’ve committed some unforgiveable crime, “WAI JIA. THERE. IS. NO. SUCH. THING. AS. A. SMALL. TURKEY!!”
“Okaaaay! Just asking!!”
Anyways, here’s one satisfied Canadian husband!
In case you’re wondering, only half the bird was devoured.
The leftovers (also a hallmark of Thanksgiving anyway) would make a great sandwich later in the week!
So, as mentioned in the previous post,
if there’s one thing you can keep doing over and over,
it’s to keep surprising each other.
Go crazy with the surprises.
And when there’s absolutely no occasion to,
it’s great to make one up!